No need to be a CREPE!!!

Crepes on deck, nutella and spice, we can eat crepes all night baby you can have any toppins you like... yeaahhhhhhh---kudos to those who can understand the song parody.

BUYING GLUTEN FREE FLOUR: Just trust the system and treat finding your flour like dating... Not all of them are good and not all of them are bad... some are dry, some are mushy, and some are like baking soda cardboard mixes, and then you will find THE ONE.  The gluten free flour you can always depend on... the one that will always be there when you are having a rough day.  I am not patient enough to buy guar gum and tapioca flour and all that jazz... so find your flour love and just go with it.  I like "pamela's pancake mix" and the "arrowhead mills" all purpose gluten free flour.

Nutella, Raspberry Jam, Banana 

WHAT YOU NEED FOR CREPES!
Gluten free flour
Eggs
Butter/canola oil
Water/Milk
Salt

WEAPONS OF CHOICE: Blender or immersion blender, and a great nonstick pan.  Whisks are great too!!!!

RECOMMENDED TOPPINGS:  NUTELLA (duh), raspberry jam, pumpkin butter, cinnamon sugar, lime and regular sugar, bananas... dream big

Depending on how much you want to make... guestimate accordingly:  This is honestly a little trial and error, but you'll get into the groove of things.

Mix water (or milk depending on your lactose situations) with a pinch of salt, an egg, and a little splash of oil.  Start adding gluten free flour (or maybe even normal flour if you have normal/ boring/ gluten-full intestines).  I usually add a bit of flour then blend... then add and blend again till I get the texture I want.  Try to make the batter thinner than pancake batter, but thicker than a glass of whole milk.  If you start pouring and the crepe comes out too thin, just add a bit more flour.

I know this is vague and perhaps frustrating, but once you've done it once and take a few minutes to try a few different ways, you will learn what works best.

Unattractive but necessary action shot. 

Once you have made the batter, spray your nonstick pan with pam.  Turn the heat up to medium low (4ish on my stove) and let the pan heat up.  Pour the batter to about half the diameter you would want your crepe to be and then stop pouring.  Take the pan and twirl it around a little to make the batter spread out.  Cook on both sides till it looks cooked/starts to brown.


EAT. DECORATE. FLIP THEM IN THE AIR.

This is really fun to do with friends... (Especially Amy, Amy, and Spencer...)  The crepes don't always look fantastic but they are fun to make and fun to eat.  We even got a couple of pans going at once!

RECOMMENDED TOPPINGS:  NUTELLA (duh), raspberry jam, pumpkin butter, cinnamon sugar, lime and regular sugar, bananas... dream big.

The Big O...

Simply Orgasmic Onion Rings.
Baked onion rings.
There is honestly no more appropriate way of explaining them...

What you need:
Onion- vadalia or yellow
Greek yogurt
Cornflakes
Pam/ canola breed of cookin spray
SPICES

Recommended spices: pepper, cumin, old bay, paprika, garlic powder, chili powder, trader joes every day spices. Like usual, GO HAM! Onion rings are supposed to be flavorful!

Get baked:
Turn the oven to 450 degrees. Start cutting up and onion to make rings at the width of your choice. If you start crying because of the onion, go with it. Pretend you feel a lot of emotion. there is no shame in crying. Anyways, I usually cut them to be about a centimeter thick. Blend up or crush a generous amount of corn flakes. I usually use an immersion blender type deal... But you you don't have one, find some hidden anger (maybe from the weeping onion experience) and use it as motivation to crush the cornflakes. Then throw all the cornflakes onto a small plate.

Take a couple spoonfuls of greek yogurt and put it into a bowl. Mix in HALF of the spices in the greek yogurt and HALF of them in the dry mix or cornflakes.

This is the messy part. Cover an onion ring with a layer of greek yogurt (this process is less than visually appealing) then cover them with crushed cornflakes. Throw them onto a Pam-ed pan... Keep doing this till you have a full.
Once you have made a bunch and reached pan capacity... Hit them up with another light spray of the canola. Bake them for 20 minutes.

They are pretty crispy and brown after 20 mins, but don't be afraid of burning them a tiny bit. Sounds crazy.. But a little bit of carbon adds to the experience.

Wanna get saucy?
I like to mix up some greek yogurt with some sriracha. Spicy and good. Otherwise catchup and sriracha is another delectable combo. Don't be a loser though, just make something with sriracha.

You have now received the recipe you need to achieve the "Big O"...

PSquared-Portabella Pizza

A kindergartner told me this joke and I feel it is recipe relevant:

A mushroom walked into a bar and the bartender says, "hey, you can't be in here"...

The mushroom responds, "Why? I'm a fungi" 

(read it out loud if you don't get it at first)

In this recipe I used fresh cherry tomatoes, but I think sun dried
would have been a better option... we all make mistakes

WARNING: This is one of those foods where you keep burning your mouth cause you can't wait long enough for it to cool before taking the next bite.

What you need:

Portabella Mushrooms

Pesto

Mozzarella

Cherry or sun dried tomatoes

Arugula 

SPICES

Recommended spices:  red pepper flakes, rosemary, herbs de provence, olive oil, garlic

Get Cookin:

Take the portabella mushrooms and scrape out the gunk and stem with spoon.  Try to be a little delicate around the edges because it helps keep the cheese from disembarking the ship while its in the oven.  

Place them on a pan so the tops of the mushroom are down and fill the scooped out section with pesto, tomatoes, spices and mozzarella.

Throw them a 350 degree oven for about 8-10 mins... chillin on the middle rack. 

After 8-10 mins, throw on some cut up arugula.  Bake this for another 8 minutes or so.  When you think everything is cooked up, throw the oven onto broil and let the shroom go for a minute or two more until you see the cheese bubble.  Bubbly cheese is one of the most satisfying images ever. 

I Butternut Squash Your Dreams!!!!

Squash Soup Recipe:

Lunch time.

What you need:
Water or broth
Chicken Bouillon Cubes/ Packets
Baked squash
Baked Sweet Potato
SPICES
--and greek yogurt for a garnish... trust me on this one.

Weapons of choice:
-beloved immersion blender... or a regular blender will do
-whatever size pot that will hold the amount of soup you are trying to make
-cover for the pot

Spice suggestions: rosemary (of course), everyday seasoning by trader joes, franks hot sauce, chili powder, pepper, cumin, garlic, chives, onion, red pepper flakes, more hot sauce... go wild.

(recipe within a recipe... i am not sure if this is taboo in blog world)
simply baked squash: peel then cut into cubes (size wise: half the size of an ice cube?).  The size doesn't have to be perfect, but just make sure it is somewhat uniform.  Toss the raw squash in a tiny bit of olive oil then bake for about 25-40 mins in a 400 degree oven.  You know it's done when you poke it and it's easily maimed with a fork. Sometimes I bake it with a few spices listed above, but that is up to you. Either way, I usually throw it in other meals, so stash some in the fridge! It keeps well if you want to use it for other things.

Onto the soup.
Put the baked/refrigerated squash in a pot and fill up with water+bouillon cubes or broth so that the liquid covers a little more than just the squash.  Turn the stove on to medium-low heat.  You can add more water/broth later depending on how think you want the soup to be.  Stir in some spices and put the lid on the pot.  Meanwhile... bake a sweet potato in the microwave after puncturing it several times so it doesn't explode and scare you from ever cooking again (I learned this lesson the hard way... now i regretfully have mild anxiety when baking potatoes in the microwave)... it takes about 6 minutes-ish or just press the "potato" button on the microwave if you have it.
Once the potato is done, add it to the pot and cover with the lid for about 5 mins.
*baby food chem lesson: pot lids rock... use them when you are making things like soups or steaming things because they capture the steam and cook things faster while keeping everything from drying out...  lids are your friends)

Once everything in the pot is looking nice, orange and squishy, you are ready to blend!!!! I love my immersion blender for this, but if you have a regular blender, you can use that too!
Bled to the texture you want. taste it. add more spices. be free. live your dreams. ADD HOT SAUCE.

It keeps really well and you can freeze it!  I like to pair it with rosemary, MORE HOT SAUCE, a hefty spoonful of greek yogurt, and sometimes gluten free english muffin!
(sidenote- greek yogurt is a FANTASTIC substitute for sour cream)

Questions? Comments? Qualms?

Have a SOUPER day.

Ode to Rosemary

It is already my third post and I am getting scared of the day when I have nothing food savvy to write about... I guess that means I better SPICE UP my writing (pun totally intended).

So I will write a joyous ode to rosemary. IT IS THE BEST SPICE EVER (aside from red pepper flakes...).

I buy dried rosemary in baby bulk from "penzy's spices" and use it in just about everything I cook. It is great with polenta, pasta, potatoes, risotto, chicken. You name it. I have made gluten free garlic and cheddar biscuits and just a bit of rosemary makes the flavor even more exciting. Over thanksgiving my parents bought this funny live rosemary bush that you could pick right off of and throw it into your food. The fresh stuff is 789,256 times better than the already incredible dried spice.

Long story short... Rosemary is gods gift to the world.
Spice racks have supernatural powers that are capable of changing the world/ your meal. The best place to start is with a jar of dried rosemary!

Simple Salmon

The salmon in the picture is from this recipe!

What you need:
Pan w/ aluminum foil
Salmon breast/steak/slab...
Olive Oil
SPICES...

Serve with rice...pasta...potatoes.. anything

Spice Ideas: everyday seasoning from trader joes, fajita seasoning, pepper, red pepper flakes, rosemary, basil, old bay, poultry seasoning, lemon... go wild

Take a raw salmon fillet/breast/steak of just about any size (if it is big... maybe cut it in half to get two good servings) and put it on a foiled pan... cover it in a light amount of olive oil and season to taste... For this recipe, I usually use a bunch of different spices and cover the top half.

Turn the oven on to broil and make sure you have a rack pretty close to the top of the oven.  Broiling is a more direct heat than baking... so just know that it is a different way of cooking the fish.
Put the fish on the top rack and broil it for 4-6 minutes then flip it over, spice the other side and broil it for another 4-6 minutes.

Check the inside to make sure it is cooked all the way!

Serve with rice...pasta...potatoes.. anything

In this recipe I mixed the salmon it in with a bit of rice/quinoa mix that I got from costco, lemon, parmesan, and frozen broccoli.

TIP:  Buy a big bag of frozen salmon steaks/fillets/whatever from costco... it was about $20 and I got ten of them... I usually make two servings from each slab so it is pretty inexpensive!

Welcome to gluten freedom

Seasons Greetings....

I am celiac (gluten free...not by choice) non-blogger with a blog... but welcome to "Gluten Freedom," my latest play space/adventure time.  A bunch of my friends falsely inflated my confidence in the kitchen by telling me that the like when I cook, and a few have mentioned that I try writing a blog about what I make. So here goes...

A few things you should know...
1. I WILL MAKE EDITING MISTAKES. OFTEN. I DO NOT CARE. I PROBABLY WON'T PROOFREAD. THIS IS NOT A "SPELLING" BLOG OR A "GRAMMAR POLICE" BLOG.  Food not grammar. Sorry not sorry.
2.  Try to understand a little bit of food chemistry... I usually just youtube things but Alton Brown is the best teacher... he has a really good show called "Good Eats" on the food network... but knowing a little about food chemistry goes a REALLY long way
3. Patience... if at first you don't success... try to make yourself eat whatever you cooked and you will probably never make the same mistake again...
4. RECIPES ARE BORING... I have ADHD and usually can't focus long enough to follow them... so just trust yourself and try not to use them... use ideas and principles of them, but not tablespoon for tablespoon measurements.
5. Think flavors. Think spices.  Add what you like. Ignore what you don't.  It is your tongue, your tastebuds, your decision.  But invest in fun spices and try to think original thoughts about flavoring things. For example- Pumpkin tastes nice with cinnamon.  Cinnamon tastes good with chocolate... blend it all together... bam.. cinnamon pumpkin cookies with chocolate chips.
6. GLUTEN FREE DOES NOT HAVE TO TASTE BAD... so this blog ALSO caters to people we boring small intestines/homies without celiacs disease.


Cheesy... but just have fun.  If you aren't, you are over thinking it.